Saint Mary's University of Minnesota Athletics

Like many mothers, my mother always dreamed of having a daughter that she could take to dance lessons. She would be the proud mother of three little ballerinas and spend her evenings at dance recitals watching her little angels float across the stage. However, my mom’s dream changed the day my father decided to take me ice skating twelve years ago.
   
That day after skating, Dad decided to take us to the local Play It Again Sports store and bought my sisters and me hockey skates. I had only been skating a few times when this woman stopped us at the rink and said they were starting up the first girls’ hockey team in Kenosha and that they were looking for girls to play. I told Dad I wanted to try it out. At that moment I had absolutely no idea how that decision would turn out to be the best decision I had ever made.

Playing hockey has been more than just a sport for me. It has brought me an indescribable amount of happiness and has become one of the biggest and most important parts of my life. I could spend pages talking about everything that hockey has done for me, but I feel like it would be filled with the same things that everyone who plays hockey would say. So, I’m just going to touch on the aspects of the game that are most important to me.
   
One of the things that has stood out in my hockey experience is that hockey has become an escape for me. It is an escape from the world when I just can’t handle what is going on in my life and the problems that I have to face. It is stable, consistent, and rewarding. Terry has always told us that nothing else matters when you are in the sanctuary. And he’s right. For just those sixty minutes, playing hockey is a lot better than the life you lead outside of the rink. The adrenaline you get from playing is better than any drug or therapy for problems. Hockey is more than just a game for me. I have learned that hockey can give you whatever you are looking for; it only matters what you are willing to give to the game that will determine what you get out of it.
   
The greatest thing that hockey has done for my life is build relationships with people. I have made some great friends through playing hockey and have met so many different kinds of people. Hockey became something that brought joy to my whole family and has become a huge part of our lives. I am so grateful that I was blessed with the opportunity to play hockey and am so thankful for the support my family has given me throughout this journey.
   
As I think about family, I think about something I wrote last year after Maddy Loftus passed. Losing Maddy made me realize that playing hockey at Saint Mary’s is more than just playing the game – it is about being a part of something great, a family. These past four years I have learned that I am a part of more than just a team. We are all a part of this big family that is working together with common goals. We fight and argue sometimes and are there for each other through tough times. We have learned to work together, even when we didn’t think we could get through challenges and problems. There have been times when I haven’t wanted to be a part of this family because I wasn’t sure I was strong enough to make it through the tough times. But it was my family that kept me going and showed me how to be strong and work through it. This family is more than just the girls on the team now. It is the current and past players, the coaches, parents, and everyone involved with the team. We all are connected through our love of the game and pride in this program. The way we came together as a family after Maddy passed really inspired me. I realized that I was a part of something greater than just a hockey team. I am blessed to be a part of this family that has shaped who I am as a person. Maddy, thank you for being our angel and helping me realize how important this family is. And thanks for helping us with that sweet comeback against St. Bens, we needed it.
   
Thinking about that comeback made me think about all the great memories I have of playing here at Saint Mary’s. I never thought that I would play college hockey and it definitely wasn’t a part of my plan once I was told that I wasn’t good enough. But once I was given the opportunity to play here, I was determined to make the most of it. I have given my heart and soul to this program for the last four years and have learned so much about working hard and pushing myself to be my best. Playing college hockey has been an experience unlike anything I could have ever imagined, and it is almost indescribable. The memories I have of big wins and personal achievements are ones I will never forget. But it is definitely time for this old lady to give someone else the opportunity to make some memories.
   
So, I decided before this gets to be too long, I should probably start thanking people. So, bare with me, this is going to take awhile.
   
Mom: I know that you never got your ballerina. I’m sorry for that. But thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to play hockey and encouraging me to keep going. I know that you realize how much I love playing and have shared the passion for the game with me. I never imagined that we would be here, celebrating the end of my college hockey career. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to play here and making so many sacrifices for me to play. I know it has been a rough journey with thousands of tears, but every minute of it has been worth it. Thank you for putting up with me and being there when I need it. You have been my rock through all of this, and I appreciate it so much. I know that you will be there for me in the next stage of my life. Thanks for being my biggest cheerleader and usually the loudest parent at my games. I am really going to miss you yelling my name and the big hugs after a game, but I know that we will get through it together. I love you so much!
   
Dad: I know a lot of hockey parents think that their kid is the best one on the team and that when things go wrong, it is always everyone else’s kids who screwed up. You are definitely one of those parents. I know that in your eyes I am the best player and you think that I should be playing in the Olympics. And as much as that bothers me because I know I am not that talented, I love that you are so proud of me and think that I could do whatever I want. Thank you for encouraging me to be my very best and making sacrifices for us to play hockey. Hockey is something that we will always have and I am truly grateful for the opportunity that you have given me to play. Thanks for always being the proudest parent in the rink. I know that we argue about the outcome of games or how I played in a game or you wanting to buy me new skates when I don’t want them, but I know that it is all because you care so much and just want to keep seeing me succeed. Thank you for everything you have done for me to play hockey. I love you!
   
Katie and Kelly: Like I said in my high school graduation speech, you guys are more than just my little sisters, you are my best friends. I know that our relationships have changed while I have been in college, but I still care so much about the two of you. I really miss the days of the Eisenhauer Triangle of Death and the memories of Komets hockey. You guys have been loyal supporters through all of this and I really appreciate you coming to the few games you were able to make. One thing I regret about being here is that I have missed you guys growing into the wonderful adults that you are becoming. I am so proud of both of you. Thank you for being such good fans, great sisters, and better friends. I love you both!
   
Aunt Martha: As of the time I wrote this, you are the only family member who was present for my one and only college goal (hopefully that is different by the time you read this). I am so happy that someone I love was there for that great memory. I know you never expected your three nieces would be hockey players or that you would teach yourself all about hockey so you could come support us. I definitely appreciate the fact that hockey has become as much a part of your life as it is ours. You have done so much for our family that often goes unacknowledged. So, this is my way of thanking you for everything that you have done for us and spoiling me my entire life. You truly are my GREAT aunt. I love you!
   
Terry: It’s been a long four years but this old lady is so grateful that you gave me an opportunity to play college hockey when no one else really did. It took awhile for me to realize the potential I had that you knew was there all along. I have learned more about hockey in these last four years from you than I ever did in the eight previous years. Thank you for being like a father to all of us and for all of the sacrifices that you have made in your life to keep coaching. Make sure to send your grandkids to my house for Halloween candy, this crabby old lady just might make an exception for them.
   
Coach A: So, I guess if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be here writing this right now. The day you called me and said that you wanted me to come visit Saint Mary’s changed my life, and I am forever grateful that you saw me play. You are like the goofy older brother to us and have made coming to hockey an enjoyable experience each day. Thank you for bringing so much passion for the game to this program.
   
Tennie: I guess I am really glad that I met you at camp the summer before you joined the team because I wasn’t as scared of you at the first dryland practice like everyone else was. I will never forget that day; it poured rain and we still went through the whole work out. Your inspirational quote for the day was, “To get where you've never been, you must do what you've never done.” And that is just what you have taught me these past three years; I have really learned how to work hard and push myself farther than I thought I could go, and I am very appreciative of that. You also helped me through a lot of the personal struggles I went through and helped me improve my game in ways that I can’t even explain. Tennie, you are a great asset to this team. Good luck with becoming Dr. McCabe, and keep the defense on their toes.
   
Ambjor: So I just wanted to thank you for being a saint. You deal with so much whining and complaining, and I realized I have definitely contributed to that for four years. Thank you for always being there to fix our athletic and non-athletic-related injuries and to listen to all the stupid things that I have done. I am definitely going to miss our little chats, and the wonderful food that you have cooked for us. You are the best.
   
Nikki Fennern, Donny Nadeau, and the rest of the Athletic department: Thank you for all that you guys do for this university. I am proud to say that I am a Cardinal which is a feeling that has been instilled in athletes because of the work that you all do. Keep up the hard work, it is very much appreciated.
   
OK team, bear with me. There is something here for all of you.
   
Lexi: I am definitely glad that I took the time to get to know you. These past four years have been a roller coaster, but through it all I knew that I could turn to you for a smile. I have had so much fun with you and there is more to come before this is all over. Lex, you have this unique sense of humor and laid-back personality that makes it easy for me to get along with you, and I am blessed to have you in my life. Thanks for being a good friend. And hey, we finally made it!
   
Cassie: So who would have thought that two girls from Kenosha would be two of the last three from our class to make it to the end. A lot has happened in that time, and I’m glad that we were here to make it through together. I wish you the best of luck in life dear, and if you ever need anything I will always be there for you.
   
Ingy: I know that there really isn’t much I can say to explain what your friendship has meant to me these last four years. We have been through so much together, and I really couldn’t be more blessed to have a friend like you. I can’t put into words what it has been like – I just have hundreds of great memories and stories. When you first came to school, we all know you really didn’t want to be here, but I am really glad we worked to keep you here because I don’t know how else I would have made it through all of this without you. I know this isn’t the end of the good times, there are sure more to come. And I want you to know that I will always be here to help you get through anything. Maybe next year will be the year when you learn to stay on your feet! Love you so much!
   
Cach: A lot has changed since your visit my freshman year, which I hope you can forgive me for. I am so impressed by how much you have matured and become a leader on this team. You are probably one of the smartest players on this team, and I have learned so much about hockey from just being in the locker room with you and on the ice. Keep up your tough attitude and continue to lead this team next year the way you already do. Thanks for a great four years.
   
Olson: I am so impressed with the way you have stepped up on this team in just two years. I am so blessed that I got to play at least these two years with you. Your hard work and passion is an inspiration to me and all of the girls. Keep up this hard work and keep inspiring this team to get better. Its players like you that make this program great and will continue to make the Cardinals a team to fear in the MIAC.  Keep working hard, bumping your sick music, and destroying that weight room girl, you rock.
   
Al: DPFL! Thanks for being a great defensive partner these last two years. It has been a blast getting to know you and playing with you. Al, you are a great person. Don’t let people bring you down because you have so much to offer; so keep shining and stay strong. And keep rockin’ that blue line for me. Going to miss you a lot!
   
Jamie: So I’m not sure why it took me three years to figure out how to shoot, or why it took your encouragement to actually get me to shoot the puck, but I am so appreciative for your positivity these past couple months. You are one of the strongest people I know to be able to make it through what you have been going through. Keep fighting, you will persist. Do me a favor, keep working your butt off and inspiring this team to work hard. You are one of the most talented hockey players I know, and I am blessed to have had the opportunity to play with you. I will always be here if you need anything.
   
Milo: I am so glad that you like me more than you used to. I kind of like you more than I used to too. I’m really happy that I got to know you better this year. Thanks for getting me to get out and enjoy my senior year, it’s been a blast so far and I know there is more to come. I really admire your strength this year, keep it up. And thanks for entertaining my parents at games, I appreciate it and they enjoy it too. Oh yeah, keep pumping that iron and making everyone jealous of your chiseled physique.
   
Sienko: You might be one of the craziest people I have ever met in my life, and I am so happy that you have been a part of this team. Everyday I look forward to coming to the locker room to hear one of your stories or see what crazy thing you are going to do. But I am also glad I got opportunities to get to know Madie as a person because you have a warm, wonderful personality. Don’t sell yourself short. Keep being the strong, beautiful person that you are. Going to miss my cubby buddy.
   
Dy: This team is so lucky that you decided to transfer because you have brought so much to this team on and off the ice. I love the way you carry the puck with confidence and blow by people like it’s your job. You are one of the most honest people I have ever met, and I love you for that. You have helped bring this team together outside of the locker room this year, which is something that we definitely needed. Thanks for being the best dance and karaoke partner ever. Take care of my kids for me next year; they are going to need someone to watch over them!
   
Dana: This summer was probably the best summer I have ever had, and I owe a lot of that to you. We pretty much had the best job ever. I’m really glad that I got to spend so much time with you and get to know you more than I probably would have if we hadn’t worked together. Keep up the hard work. You are a great asset to this team, and I am for sure going to miss all of the adventures we had together this summer. But if I need a reminder, I can always just look at the sweet swirl marks on the plexi-glass in the rink to jog my memory.
   
Peanut: It’s been a rough going for you these last two seasons, but I admire the fact that you stick around and continue to support your teammates. I have had so much fun with you. Thanks for always finding a way to make me smile when I’m down. Keep your head up and keep smiling!
   
Rach: Or should I say LaRayRay! Girl, you are so spunky, and I love the energy that you bring to this team. I never worry about you because you consistently work hard and get the job done. You are a great player with a lot of potential. Have the confidence to make the big plays and take those shots from the point because you can! Thanks for being such a good teammate and always making people smile with your humor and kind heart.
   
Stevie: The first night I met you when we had our little Gilmore creek adventure, I knew I was going to like you, a lot. You are one of the most honest people I have ever met. I love the way you enjoy life and always find a way to work hard and get the job done. You are a very talented hockey player, and I am going to miss being on the ice with you everyday. Keep working hard and having fun!
   
Sheree: Kia Ora Mate! I am definitely going to miss greeting you with the only New Zealand phrase I have ever learned to say properly. Thanks for being a part of Team Extreme with me; you truly are extreme in everything you do. Getting to know you and learn about a different culture has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my college career. You have opened my eyes to so many new things. Sheree, you are also one of the kindest people I have ever met and you make every conversation enjoyable. Keep working hard and representing those who are truly extreme!
   
EJB: You are the definition of a good teammate. You show up and work hard every time you are on the ice. You don’t complain and don’t cause conflict. You have also improved so much in such a short time. This team is lucky to have you, and I am so happy that I had such a great teammate.
   
Erin: The first time I skated with you in captain’s practice I knew you were going to be important to this team. I look at you and see a bit of myself in you. You work your tail off every second you are on that ice and are hungry to make yourself a better player. This team is lucky to have someone with your work ethic. I’m going to miss seeing your smiling face everyday. I don’t need to tell you to keep working hard because I know you will.
   
KK: So, you haven’t mastered the whole concept of a filter yet, but I don’t think I would have you any other way Kaye. You say whatever you are thinking and are brutally honest. And I love it. I’m going to miss your great one-liners. And not to mention, your stellar play in the net. You have made some unbelievable saves this year and have kept us going strong. This team would be nothing without you. I don’t know what else to say other than I am really going to miss you in general.
   
Bartosz: My life changed the day I met you (told you I would write that). I am glad you were a part of this team because you work hard and have improved so much this year. Keep up the hard work and that feisty personality.
   
Bri: You are a very talented player and have so much potential. Keep working hard and improving, and you will continue to be an important part of this team. Good luck with the rest of your career, girl!
   
Tara: I know I didn’t really get to know you too well, but you definitely brighten up the locker room with your laughter and smile. Keep up the hard work. Good luck with volleyball next year. Maybe you guys can win this school a championship!
   
And now for everyone else:
   
Sonja and Cierra: The team definitely wasn’t the same without you two this year. I missed not seeing you guys everyday, but I admire how strong the two of you have been and how you both still have such a passion for the game. I love you both so much and am glad we still have time to have fun together before this is all over!
   
Val: I am so blessed that I had an opportunity to play with you for two years. I know things didn’t necessarily end the way you had hoped, but you definitely taught me a lot about what it means to work hard, to play for your teammates, and to be a Cardinal. I am so happy that you are doing so well for yourself. Miss you and your wonderful parents!
   
Ricki: These last two years haven’t been the same without you on the team. You were my rock for two years, and I was happy that we had each other to get through it all. I’m so proud of all that you have done since and know you have a wonderful future ahead!
   
Kryzer: I know that it was rough the way that you ended your career, but I admire so much the way you have still made hockey a part of your life. I think it is great that you are coaching here in Winona. It’s been a crazy four years and I can’t wait to finish it out!
   
Class of ’07: This group of seniors really showed me what it meant to have Cardinal Pride and to be a part of this program during my freshman year. I learned so much from all of you in one short year and was inspired to work hard for these last three. Thank you so much for leaving such a wonderful and important impression on my life.
   
My roommates and friends: Thanks for being my cheerleaders. I know how I can get during the hockey season; this is my big thanks for putting up with me and helping me stay strong through everything. I love you guys so much!
   
Steve Carlson: I’m not sure if you will get a chance to read this, but I wanted to thank you for believing in me and giving me the confidence to believe in myself. You really have helped me improve my skills and game in more ways than I ever thought possible. Thank you for being a great teacher and mentor and helping me appreciate the game of hockey.
   
OK, I think it’s about time I wrap this up. So I leave with this. This last year of hockey has been one that I will never forget. This is the best team I have ever been a part of and I am so proud of the direction this team is going. I kind of feel like a mother that is leaving her kids behind, but this mother will never forget her kids and everything we have been through. And like most good mothers, I want to leave my kids with some advice: Learn from those who have come before you and the lessons they have to share. You will be in this position sooner than you think. When you get here, you want to have as few regrets as possible. Realize that you are a part of something great and have been given a great opportunity. When you put on that jersey and cheer “Cardinal Pride,” think about what that really means and truly be proud, because so many people will never get an opportunity like you have. Live for it and make it worth it. You are each so special and letting you go is going to be so hard, but please make the most of what you have. I love this team, and I love being a Cardinal.
   
OK, I’m done. And Milo, I only cried once, just so you know.

Cardinal Pride!